Um.
I'm still here. I just haven't felt like blogging lately. I guess tonight, when I should already be in bed, is different. I am not sure how different, b/c I still don't feel like blogging...yet here I am. The thing is, I LOVE to sleep. It's like...one of my favorite pasttimes. Why am I still on the friggin computer then?!? What do I have against me that I would withold blissful snuggling with my pillow? I don't know. I guess I hate me...or something.
Didn't I mention before how I hate making decisions? I'm sure I did. *goes to check* Yeah, I said that. I probably have said it more times than I think, actually. Well, golly-gee I do hate it. Why? Obvious. One bad decision could lead to a myriad of others and then I'd be on this sick cycle carousel trying to find my way back home. Bacon or sausage? Scrambled or fried (hungry yet?)? Ok so those two don't really make for hard decisions, yet I tend to put the "breakfast" questions in my life up on that pedestal of "Oh man..what if I screw this up!?" Really now. Meat is meat and eggs are eggs. Why can't I see that?
I don't know what my deal is, but I need to let go. I'm tripping out over picking out insurance plans. Ha..nothing like a "what if" thing to completely screw up a "what if" mind!!!! You know...insurance. You're essentially paying for the "what ifs" in life. Of course, with me and medical junk...there are no "what ifs." Have you heard the one about me falling in the shower??? So, this one should be easy, eh? HA!
I just can't seem to figure things out. When I try to "break down" a situation in order to make the task easier, those smaller things end up multiplying like gremlins and becomes a honking heap of question marks. How the heck do I do that??? I swear. I need to channel this skill into something that actually pays the rent. Then I can really get away from my current job :p.
I need a hefty dose of optimism right now. Check that...I need a hefty intravenous dose of optimism. Be sure to add a few CCs of confidence too, while you're at it.
Is there a doctor in the house?
6 comments:
I'm praying for you, Amy!
Sorry I haven't commented before now. I don't relish the decision making process much either and have had many decisions to make lately...
WAR EAGLE!
I hate making decisions, too, and I hate change. I can get pretty stuck sometimes. So I hear ya!
It's been awhile since you posted, I just wondered how you're doing. Take care!
Hey guys.
Wow..it's been a while!!!
It seems like the only time I've had on the 'Net is to check email OR I've been upset and just don't want to blog...though I need to vent. LOL! Know what I mean? I said some stuff on the Ship, but that's where it needs to stay.
As far as job stuff...well..I'm still where I am. Some days, I feel as if I'm on the cusp of some sort of understanding, but then it passes :p.
I started writing again. I have had a premise for a story floating around in my noggin since early this semester and I put pencil to paper today (yes..very high tech, I know...but, when you have down time in the middle of a classroom, that's as good as it gets...me, on a stool, surrounded by teenagers. I'm either reading a book or jotting down lists of things I need to take care of that day/week.). Vamos a ver (we'll see).
Thanks for checking on me :-)
POST SOMETHING!!
Love Ya, AYM!!
You don't need a doctor anymore, you need a coroner!
Where in the world is Amy!?
Did you know that it's been over a year since you've blogged? Craziness!!!!
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