Today's not been the best day (carried over from something last night), and my meeting at UTD with their Teacher Certification dept didn't go so well. Let's just say that, combined with an email I got at work (from work), my future is as cloudy as......well, it's just cloudy.
I'm having a hard time keeping my chin up, despite some good Bible reading I did earlier today. I even memorized a verse, but Satan just won't leave me alone. Ah, and wouldn't ya know it? I forgot the "address" of the verse!!! Anyway, it says, "Do not grow weary of doing good, for at the proper time, your reward in heaven will come." (Ok, so that was definitely paraphrased)
I didn't do a focused study, mainly because it was too hard to concentrate in the office today. I have my pocket sized New Testament at work (would like one that is the complete Bible) and I basically read through verses I'd underlined in the past few years. When something spoke to me outside of that, I underlined and noted the date. I like doing that so that when I go back and look over different chapters, I can see how God was speaking to me at that particular time.
Anyway, not to sound like a whiny whinger, but I'm just tired of stuff right now and I don't know what to do. AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No comments necessary. Not that this was anything worth commenting about :p. I don't know why I even blog. I probably should just keep stuff like this in my own journal (especially if the purpose of my blogging is just to vent). *note to self: vent in journal* There's too much to read on the Net these days, anyway!!!
Ah, I'm rambling.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Thursday, April 20, 2006
I'm a horrible blog reader....(edited)
I misread on September's blog that Carmel had tagged me on her Xanga when, actually, it was September tagging me. Matt was the one tagged by Carmel.
I don't know that I know what Xanga is, but I bet it's a lot like this blogger dealio. I'm such a fogey....
Six things about myself....right?
1. I was unexpected. My parents had their "eenie, meenie, and miney" and didn't want no "moe," but 10 years later, they got me. I was a surprise to EVERYONE (and not a pleasant one to some..namely my sis closest to my age) and even decided to make an early entrance weighing in at 3 lbs 8 1/2 oz. If I were born a boy, my name would have been Jonathan Eugene. (So glad I was a girl!!). Coincidentally, my oldest sister was to have that name had she been a boy (She was also to be Laura Elizabeth, but that would have made her initials spell L-E-G, so she got Beth and I got the longer version).
2. My oldest sister thinks I'm wordy. Big shock to you all, eh? *Makes note to self to avoid sending out those stupid "Send this to your friends and then send back to me" emails asking to be described in one word....*
3. If I could have any talent(s), it would be to sing and play the guitar (but I'm so fickle in my thinking that that desire could change any minute). Oh..maybe I'd write a book. Children's, a bio, or fiction? Not sure....I am WORDY!!!! :p
4. My life's ambition is to serve others (I wish I could work with the crew of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition or something like that). Sometimes my human nature gets in the way, though.
5. This is my first season to "watch" American Idol. *cringes* I am not sure why I bother...but I'm attracted to talent shows for some reason (even though it's more of a popularity contest....ugh).
6. I have VERY vivid dreams and can tell you almost every detail later.
I don't know that I know what Xanga is, but I bet it's a lot like this blogger dealio. I'm such a fogey....
Six things about myself....right?
1. I was unexpected. My parents had their "eenie, meenie, and miney" and didn't want no "moe," but 10 years later, they got me. I was a surprise to EVERYONE (and not a pleasant one to some..namely my sis closest to my age) and even decided to make an early entrance weighing in at 3 lbs 8 1/2 oz. If I were born a boy, my name would have been Jonathan Eugene. (So glad I was a girl!!). Coincidentally, my oldest sister was to have that name had she been a boy (She was also to be Laura Elizabeth, but that would have made her initials spell L-E-G, so she got Beth and I got the longer version).
2. My oldest sister thinks I'm wordy. Big shock to you all, eh? *Makes note to self to avoid sending out those stupid "Send this to your friends and then send back to me" emails asking to be described in one word....*
3. If I could have any talent(s), it would be to sing and play the guitar (but I'm so fickle in my thinking that that desire could change any minute). Oh..maybe I'd write a book. Children's, a bio, or fiction? Not sure....I am WORDY!!!! :p
4. My life's ambition is to serve others (I wish I could work with the crew of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition or something like that). Sometimes my human nature gets in the way, though.
5. This is my first season to "watch" American Idol. *cringes* I am not sure why I bother...but I'm attracted to talent shows for some reason (even though it's more of a popularity contest....ugh).
6. I have VERY vivid dreams and can tell you almost every detail later.
Monday, April 10, 2006
Hear ye, hear ye....
Oh...I dunno.
Matt just asked for an update. :p
I still haven't decided what I shall do for next year, though part of me wants to go ahead and let my supervisor know I won't be back (b/c most of me has already checked out, anyway).
Fear has its grip on me. I can take any job I am even remotely thinking about and find something "icky" about it and move on to the next prospect. "Icky" ranges from weird hours to uncertain elements. I think I have a psychosis. :p
I just need to "get quiet" and let God speak. I'm running so fast in circles that I'm sure He's trying to snatch me up and calm me down, though I won't let him (and we all know He's more than capable to stop me in my tracks. He's just waiting on ME.).
Sigh.
So, that's why there hasn't been an update. All I can think about is "next year" and a little bit about "right now." I have the ulcers to prove how stressed I'm allowing myself to get. Part of me feels like there's a human being walking this earth who knows what I'm supposed to do and if I can just find him/her, I'd be golden. Why is that??? Talk about weird....
Frustrating.....saddening.....maddening. :)
Matt just asked for an update. :p
I still haven't decided what I shall do for next year, though part of me wants to go ahead and let my supervisor know I won't be back (b/c most of me has already checked out, anyway).
Fear has its grip on me. I can take any job I am even remotely thinking about and find something "icky" about it and move on to the next prospect. "Icky" ranges from weird hours to uncertain elements. I think I have a psychosis. :p
I just need to "get quiet" and let God speak. I'm running so fast in circles that I'm sure He's trying to snatch me up and calm me down, though I won't let him (and we all know He's more than capable to stop me in my tracks. He's just waiting on ME.).
Sigh.
So, that's why there hasn't been an update. All I can think about is "next year" and a little bit about "right now." I have the ulcers to prove how stressed I'm allowing myself to get. Part of me feels like there's a human being walking this earth who knows what I'm supposed to do and if I can just find him/her, I'd be golden. Why is that??? Talk about weird....
Frustrating.....saddening.....maddening. :)
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